Chat gpt를 활용한 영어 글쓰기 연습 - #2

How to do:

Chat gpt를 활용한 영어 글쓰기 연습 - Intro

Chat gpt를 활용한 영어 글쓰기 연습 - Intro

 

Prompt:

Some people believe that the advancement of technology has significantly improved our lives. Others argue that it has brought about more problems than benefits. Write an essay in which you discuss the impact of technology on our lives. Do you believe technology has had a more positive or negative effect overall? Support your position with reasons and examples.

 

Before:

Some people think that the advancement of technology has improved our lives. Others argue that it has brought about more problems than benefits. Both sides of opnions are understandable and directly related to our lives so that I can say It's very controversial. If I had to choose either of them, although some people argue that it has more negative effects overall, I believe the advancement of technology has had more positive effects on our society.

 

It's true that it has brought many negative issues to our society. First, we could be a target of cyber-crime. In order to do online shoppings, we might enter our personal information on many different website. It might be name, address, phone number and credit card information. Unfortunately, If a cyber hacker, who steals personal information, installed a hacking program on your account or your computer, there's possibilities that your information can be transferred to them. Second, the advancement of technology makes our society competitive. Even though what I have is something ordinary, when I see what my friend's recent purchase, I can find myself comparing and devaluating. 

 

Although it has had negative effects on our society, I believe the advancement of technology has brought more positive effects than side effects. First, we can buy anything we want wherever we are through the Internet. I have ordered a japanese music CD on Ebay, a european style furniture on Amazon, and korean cosmetics on their online shopping mall, which was delievered right from South Korea. Second, we can go travel anywhere we want. We can drive, get on a flight or a helicopter to get to the destination. I believe It's a result of advancement of transportation. Third, we can communicate others regardless the distance. I can do voice/video call my family anytime I want even though they are living in South Korea, which is 15 hours away by flight from the U.S. 

 

In conclusion, even though the advancement of technology has brought about many problem to our society, I believe It has improved our lives more than that. It gives us many opportunities in various parts of our lives. And, it makes our lives better and more convenient. (365 words)

 

Chat GPT:

최근에 Chat GPT가 조금 업데이트 되었는지, 더 세분하게 내 글의 고칠 점에 대해서 알려주었다.

Chat gpt_Writing practice_#2_1

 

1. 더 나은 영어표현 제안:

Both sides of opnions are understandable and directly related to our lives so that I can say It's very controversial.
(변경) The impact of technological advancements on our lives is a subject of ongoing debate. 

Even though what I have is something ordinary, when I see what my friend's recent purchase, I can find myself comparing and devaluating.
(변경 / 수정) Even though I may possess something ordinary, when a friend shares a post about their recent purchase, I find myself comparing and devaluing what In have. 

We could be a target of cyber-crime. In order to do online shoppings, we might enter our personal information on many different website.
(변경) We could become targets of cybercrime when making online purchases by entering personal information on various websites.

2. 글에 대한 코멘트: Paragarph을 구별해라

Consider breaking it into distinct paragraphs for each point you make. For example, have separate paragraphs for discussing cyber-crime, online shopping, transportation, and communication.

3. 글에 대한 코멘트: 예시나 디테일한 설명을 더 많이 넣어라 

Try to expand on these examples and provide more specific details or statistics to strengthen your arguments. Additionally, consider adding real-life examples or anecdotes to make your essay more engaging.

4. 글에 대한 코멘트: Transition 을 잘 활용해라

Incorporate transition words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay. These help guide the reader from one point to the next.

5. 문법 교정:

In conclusion, even though the advancement of technology has brought about many problem to our society, I believe It has improved our lives more than that. 

(수정)In conclusion, even though the advancement of technology has brought about many problems to our society, I believe It has improved our lives more than that. 

Chat GPT (2nd):

문법과 단어에 대한 추가 질문

Chat gpt_Writing practice_#2_2

 

1. 단어 교정:

Both sides of opnions are understandable.
(오타수정) Both sides of opinions are understandable.

I can find myself comparing and devaluating.
(Devalue -> Devaluing / Devaluation) I can find myself comparing and devaluing.

I have ordered a japanese music CD on Ebay...
(대문자 사용) I have ordered a Japanese music CD on Ebay...

And, it makes our lives better and more convenient.
(더 나은 단어) And, it improves our lives and makes them more convenient.

2. 문법 교정:

 If I had to choose either of them...
(변경) If I have to choose either of them...

I have ordered a japanese music CD on Ebay...
(대문자 사용) I have ordered a Japanese music CD on Ebay..

If a cyber hacker, who steals personal information, installed a hacking program on your account or your computer, there's possibilities that your information can be transferred to them.
(변경) If a cyber hacker, who steals personal information, installs a hacking program on your account or your computer, there's a possibility that your information could be transferred to them.

Rev:

Some people think that the advancement of technology has improved our lives. Others argue that it has brought about more problems than benefits. Both sides of opinions are understandable and directly related to our lives so that I can say It's very controversial. The impact of technological advancements on our lives is a subject of ongoing debate. If I had have to choose either of them, although some people argue that it has more negative effects overall, I believe the advancement of technology has had more positive effects on our society.

 

It's true that it has brought many negative issues to our society. First, we could be a target of cyber-crime. In order to do online shoppings, we might enter our personal information on many different website. We could become targets of cybercrime when making online purchases by entering personal information on various websites. It might be name, address, phone number and credit card information. Unfortunately, If a cyber hacker, who steals personal information, installed Installs a hacking program on your account or your computer, there's possibilities a possibility that your information can be could be transferred to them. Second, the advancement of technology makes our society competitive. Even though what I have is something ordinary, when I see what my friend's recent purchase, I can find myself comparing and devaluating.  Even though I may possess something ordinary, when a friend shares a post about their recent purchase, I find myself comparing and devaluting what I have. 

 

Although it has had negative effects on our society, I believe the advancement of technology has brought more positive effects than side effects. First, we can buy anything we want wherever we are through the Internet. I have ordered a Japanese music CD on Ebay, a european style furniture on Amazon, and korean cosmetics on their online shopping mall, which was delievered right from South Korea. Second, we can go travel anywhere we want. We can drive, get on a flight or a helicopter to get to the destination. I believe It's a result of advancement of transportation. Third, we can communicate others regardless the distance. I can do voice/video call my family anytime I want even though they are living in South Korea, which is 15 hours away by flight from the U.S. 

 

In conclusion, even though the advancement of technology has brought about many problems to our society, I believe It has improved our lives more than that. It gives us many opportunities in various parts of our lives. And, it makes our lives better and more convenient. It improves our lives and make them more convenient. 

 

Final comments:

• be 와 become을 구분해서 잘 쓰도록 해야겠다. We could become targets of cybercrime when making online purchases by entering personal information on various websites.
• 저번과 똑같이 쓸 수 있었던 문장: Even though I may posses something ordinary, when a friend shares a post about their recent purchase, I find myself comparing and devaluing what I have.